Rule Five Three-Time Loser Friday

A long-time adviser to Her Imperial Majesty Hillary I, Dowager Empress of Chappaqua, said earlier this week that Her Imperial Highness will run for President again in 2020 – and that she’ll lose again.  Figures.  Excerpt:

Mark Penn, a top Democratic pollster and senior adviser to the Clintons and Andrew Stein, a Democrat who endorsed Trump in 2016, detailed why they think Lady Macbeth is ready for another go at the White House (via WSJ):  (Note:  The WSJ piece is paywalled.)

Expect Hillary 4.0 to come out swinging. She has decisively to win those Iowa caucus-goers who have never warmed up to her. They will see her now as strong, partisan, left-leaning and all-Democrat—the one with the guts, experience and steely-eyed determination to defeat Mr. Trump. She has had two years to go over what she did wrong and how to take him on again.

Richard Nixon came back from his loss to John F. Kennedy in 1960 and won the presidency in 1968. He will be the model for winning again. Mrs. Clinton won’t travel the country in a van with Huma Abedin this time, doing small events and retail politics. Instead she will enter through the front door, mobilizing the army of professional women behind her, leveraging her social networks, and raking in donations. She will hope to emerge as an unstoppable force to undo Mr. Trump, running on the #MeToo movement, universal health care and gun control. Proud and independent, this time she will sideline Bill and Mr. Obama, limiting their role to fundraising.

The generation of Democrats who have been waiting to take over the party from the Clintons will be fuming that she is back and stealing their show. But they revealed themselves to be bungling amateurs in the Brett Kavanaugh nomination fight, with their laughable Spartacus moments. She will trounce them. Just as Mr. Trump cleared the field, Mrs. Clinton will take down rising Democratic stars like bowling pins. Mike Bloomberg will support her rather than run, and Joe Biden will never be able to take her on.

Don’t pay much attention to the “I won’t run” declarations. Mrs. Clinton knows both Mr. Clinton and Mr. Obama declared they weren’t running, until they ran. She may even skip Iowa and enter the race later, but rest assured that, one way or another, Hillary 4.0 is on the way.

President Trump is no doubt salivating at the very idea.

The Democrats, if they have a single brain cell among them, must already be figuring out who in their party is going to bell the cat and tell Her Imperial Majesty to shut up and go home.  All they need in the 2020 election is Her Royal Highness cackling, shambling, stumbling, hectoring, being carried up stairs and fainting through another election.  Her 2016 campaign was a weird, surreal combination of Weekend at Bernie’s, Sally from Mystery Men and The Devil Wears Prada.

Her Imperial Majesty never had the campaign skills her husband wielded so effortlessly.  While it would be roundly amusing to see her bumble another Presidential run, the Democrats won’t allow it.  Their bench is pretty thin for 2020, but let’s be honest; of a list of bad candidates, she’s the worst.

It’s way past time the Dowager Empress retired.