Now, moving on; it seems the world is ending on Saturday. Uh HUH. So let’s start that countdown:
FIVE DAYS UNTIL THE END.
I’ll update the countdown, thoughtful guy that I am, until Saturday. At least we’ll have a Gingermageddon for that last day. Excerpt:
A Christian numerologist claims a verse in the Bible proves that the world will end on September 23.
In Luke’s passage 21: 25 to 26, there is a quote which apparently matches the date of the Great American Solar Eclipse, when Hurricane Harvey hit and when Texas was flooded.
September 23 was pinpointed using codes from the Bible and also a “date marker” shown by the pyramids of Giza in Egypt.
But NASA has dismissed the claims, insisting the Planet X theory is merely a hoax.
Conspiracies about the mysterious planet named Nibiru suggest it could be headed towards Earth to destroy it on September 23.
It was first mentioned in 1976 by author Zecharia Sitchin in his book The 12th Planet.
He believed the planet is home to ancient aliens called the Annunaki who he claimed created the human race.
As the date fast approaches, Christian conspiracy theorist David Meade expects says Nibiru, also known as Planet X, will pass the Earth – bringing with it volcanic eruptions, tsunamis and earthquakes.
Meade buys into the idea that a 2,000-year-old prophecy, which was described in the book of Revelation, will cause an apocalypse.
Somehow, somewhere, this asshole is making money on this; bet on it. The only other possible explanations are that he’s clinically insane or as dumb as a bag of hammers inside another bag of wet hair which has been repeatedly beaten with the stupid stick.
Why would I be so harsh? Simple – the prophecy game has one rule: Don’t make prophecies that can be shown to have been bullshit. Especially don’t make prophecies that will be shown to have been bullshit within a week.
But, just in case, we’ll keep the countdown going. Hold on to your butts, True Believers!