Animal’s Daily News

Silver BearBoy, there’s been a lot of flapodoodle about The Donald’s leaked tax return information.  But here’s what everyone is missing about this fake controversy.

The key takeaway from this story isn’t whether The Donald fiddled his taxes.  It isn’t about whether he did or didn’t mismanage his company badly enough to lose millions of dollars.  It isn’t even about Her Imperial Majesty taking to the stump to proclaim The Donald’s supposed tax malfeasance.

It’s about the ridiculous, Byzantine tax system that makes this kind of thing possible.  Our tax code is currently running about 75,000 pages.  Take a look at the page count of some literary monoliths for comparison:

  • War and Peace:  1.440 pages.
  • The Bible (depending on edition):  1,200 pages.
  • Atlas Shrugged:  1,008 pages.
  • For Whom The Bell Tolls:  480 pages.

Call two different IRS reps with a question and you’ll likely give you two different answers.  Nobody – not tax lawyers, not tax accountants, not the IRS themselves – knows everything that’s in that gigantic mess.

So, should we blame The Donald for hiring people to pore over this gargantuan Imperial code and find every way possible to save his business money?

Excellent BearOur own family’s business is a tiny, tiny fraction of the size of the Trump empire, and I can assure all of you True Believers that Mrs. Animal performs her own analysis of the tax code and how we can apply it to pay every penny of Imperial taxes we are required by law to pay – and not one penny more.

Everyone who has ever filled out an Imperial tax return has done the same.  The next person I hear about who voluntarily paid more taxes than required will be the first.

So why should the media and Her Imperial Majesty’s campaign fault The Donald for the same thing?