Before we get into today’s gruesome story, check out my latest over at Glibertarians!
Now then: Take a look at this, just as an illustration of how brutal most of human history has been. Excerpt:
In a new paper published in the journal Scientific Reports, a team of scientists analyzed a collection of at least 12 severed hands found in an ancient Egyptian palace. The macabre trove (which would surely peak the interest of Wednesday Adams) may be the first physical evidence of a gruesome, militaristic ceremony.
Archaeologists originally unearthed the grisly find back in 2011. The hands were strewn in three pits in front of the throne room of a palace dated to around 1600 BC at Tell el-Dab’a in northeastern Egypt. This would have been during the century-long 15th Dynasty, when invading Hyksos from the Levant ruled the northern part of the country from their capital Avaris. Tell el-Dab’a is where Avaris once stood.
Here’s the interesting bit:
Hieroglyphs discovered in various locations dated to the second half of ancient Egypt’s roughly 3,000-year history hint that soldiers would sometimes present the severed right hands of defeated foes to the Pharaoh to garner the “gold of honor,” a prestigious reward that came in the form of a collar of golden beads. But it was hard to know whether these depictions portrayed an accurate or mythologized account of the past.
The new analysis of the severed hands leaves little doubt that the “gold of honor” ceremony actually occurred.

There’s a distinct tendency for folks to glamorize the past. But the simple fact is, as this discovery shows very plainly, the past was pretty damn gory and brutal. Romantic depictions aside, things like this – cutting off the hands (and other appendages) of defeated enemies wasn’t all that uncommon. And when it was done to appease a ruler, such as the Egyptian pharaohs – who were sort of “god-kings” – well, all I can say is, fuck that whole notion, sideways!
Most of human history is replete with this kind of crap. We’ve been extremely fortunate over the last few decades; I’d like to think we’ll remain so fortunate. But recent events have me wondering. Make no mistake, True Believers; this is what we are in danger of slipping back to.