Animal’s Daily Crazy Norks News

The bat-guano crazy Norks, the denizens of that isolated Stalinist state led by a stunted gargoyle with bad hair from a long line of stunted gargoyles with bad hair, is supposedly training to hit the United States.

Yeah, right.  Excerpt:

Nuclear-armed North Korea said Tuesday its missile launches were training for a strike on US bases in Japan, as global condemnation of the regime swelled.

Three of the four missiles fired Monday came down provocatively close to US ally Japan, in waters that are part of its exclusive economic zone, representing a challenge to US President Donald Trump.

In a phone call, Trump and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe warned that the threat from North Korea had “entered a new stage”.

The UN Security Council scheduled an emergency meeting for Wednesday after a request by Washington and Tokyo to discuss additional measures following the launch.

Under UN resolutions, Pyongyang is barred from any use of ballistic missile technology, and the US ambassador to the UN, Nikki Haley, said on Twitter that the world “won’t allow” North Korea to continue on its “destructive path”.

But six sets of UN sanctions since its first nuclear test in 2006 have failed to halt its drive for what it insists are defensive weapons.

Of course, these missiles aren’t defensive weapons.  They can’t be.  They are offensive weapons, ones which Kim Jong Un (the aforementioned stunted little gargoyle with bad hair) has no intention of using.

This is some damnably expensive saber-rattling for a country where most of the citizens are on the edge of starvation.  But saber-rattling is precisely what it is, and it has a purpose; whenever the Norks do it, they are angling for something or another; shipments of food, oil, or easing of some sanctions or other.  They do this because so far it’s worked for them every time.

It might be interesting to see what President Trump might do.  And, again, that may be why the Norks are rattling this particular saber at this particular moment.  They may want to find out.

Threatening America’s best ally in the Pacific may not be the smartest way to go about it.