- Taking a dump on Turkmenistan.
- Being in a situation where I can accurately say to someone “you have arrived just in time for my moment of triumph!”
- Go on a Cape Buffalo hunt in which I kill a massive bull in a full charge, timed so that he slides, dead, up to the toes of my boots. Note that this item will likely necessitate a change of underwear immediately thereafter.
- Bitch-slap Chuck Schumer.
- Drive the AlCan.
- Go hunting in Siberia.
- See the following places:
- Tierra del Fuego
I have more bucket list items, but those are just a few of my favorites.
I know the science in Jurassic Park is pretty much at the Star Trek level of bullshit, but I wish it wasn’t, solely because I think hunting a full-grown bull T-rex would be an unimaginably awesome adventure.
Having spent a fair amount of time in Japan, I’ve often wondered why Japanese schoolgirls wear what amounts to a sailor’s uniform. They aren’t going to school on a ship – so, why?
By the time Mrs. Animal and I leave here on Saturday, I will have spent nigh unto a year now working and living in Silicon Valley. I can sum up my experience temporarily residing in California with three words: Fuck this place.
On that note, we return you to your Thursday, already in progress.